Instead of doing homework, practicing the piano or memorizing words in the dictionary like my dad wanted me to do daily, I would sit in front of the T.V. with the volume on low so my dad couldn’t hear it from their room and watch He-Man and the Masters of the Universe.
Just me, cheese balls, a Sprite and He-Man. PERFECT DAY.
And my dad caught on to the fact I was not reading the dictionary like I was supposed to when he asked me the definition of and to spell bacillicide. I thought it was a cleaner of some sort – like go clean the kitchen with some of that bacillicide under the kitchen sink.
I got the Asian stare down and then my dad said, you have to know these things – don’t you want to go to college?
Apparently, bacillicide is a killer of berries. Was my dad trying to tell me something?
How am I not traumatized by my childhood?